drunk
woke up and started getting drunk. I could'nt be late anymore so i had to go to work drunk
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Expelled
School is more then a job. So when you get expelled, its pretty freakin sweet. Ok, my friend John must be retarded. He was a senior at my school until he took a senior prank a little too far. Our school has a magnificent library; very spacious, and peaceful, and the proctors of this library like to keep the peace. John and his friends have one goal in life; to disturb this peace. So this kid John, he's a pretty crazy kid. He decides it'd be funny to steal a bunch of chickens from a farm near his house, and let them into the library's secretive back door. Now chickens are elusive animals. I've been in a 10ft by 10ft pen with a chicken, and never caught it. Imagine 7 chickens with an entire library to roam. Not going to lie, I peed my pants laughing. The school had to call animal control to come and get the chickens. John was put in front of the school's judiciary committee, and unanimously expelled.
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wal-mart
I was at a party befor work somoene gave me acid, later at work i began to trip and rearranged almost everything in wal-mart well I got fired.
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mc donalds fight
i was duty manager and one of my co workers called me to deal with an angry custermer so i go to the counter and then i have a cheesebuger thrown in my face so i jump over the counter with my kitchen spatula and hit the guy 3 times with it in fornt of about 20 customers then i turned around and my boss was there i said to him i come to your office in five minutes.
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too hungover
Well, I had partied alot, and i already had another job, so i wasn't too worried about it. well, i was soooo hungover that on my 3rd day of work, i called in, and resulting in me getting fired immediately after saying i wasn't coming in.
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just because I
Well me and my best girl friend had closed the store early.. we have these maniquins we put in the windows at night.. well we put different clothes on them every night, so we were underssing them, and we started acting like we were rubbing them...you know where.. well it started turning us on so we started making out with the maniquin and then each other. then the boss came in and called the cops.. we picked up our checks 2 days later.. so we really need the money
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Clash of Personalities
I was working in an office, it was only small being myself, the senior office girl, the boss, the manager and one labourer. The Senior office girl and i didn't hit it off at all, she was constantly finding ways to put me down and make my days miserable. I had been there a month when one day i had worked very hard to put the filing system in order and gone to do another job, and when i returned there were files all over the place and she told me to put them back. I know she was the senior but that just made me see red and i told her to stuff it. The boss came out and told us both to go out to lunch and i stormed out and went home without telling them. They fired me the next day and i don't regret it.
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Wrong Place Wrong Time
I was working at a little family owned grocery store. It was my time to get off of work and i was waiting for my ride to get there. I was sitting behind the store waiting and the owner comes walking out the back door. I thought it was one of my friends i was going to stop them and talk to them so i proceeded to walk over to the door. There was two gallons of milk and two boxes of cereal sitting behind the store. I am a lactose keep this in mind. Well the owner started flipping out on me saying i was fired and that he didnt want to see me ever again. So that was that...wrong place at the wrong time. but the kid that did steal the stuff was fired two weeks after that for stealing cigarettes.
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stonner
i turned up to a stripper bar stoned as a ma fucker i seen the boss there so i ask her if i could get her a drink she said yes what a lovely man i said i know its in ma dna she laughed and said you can go and meet the strippers after the show if you want i said thanks can i get your number sh said sure here it is 0212152??? i said can i come to your house for a good night she said yes i said can one of the strippers come of course so on we went to her house when we get to her house she starts to strip i say oh yeah then we go up stairs for a great time when we were finnished her husband turned up i tried to hide but he found me and it was ma boss from work and i was like oh shit catch you up the next day when i turn up at work the boss was not there when i got there so i just got down ta business in the back then as i got up the boss said i'll like to see you in ma office please i go all shit this can't be good so when i get in there he says you have been fired im like no i have just been f#@!$% your wife it was nice aswell so he told me pack ma stuff up so i said does that include your wife he just said get owt now! so i did and thats how i got fired... tH!$ @!NT TR{}E
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the bosses wife
i was at home wagging work getting on with the bosses wife until ma boss rang up and ask me why i wasnt at work i told him that i was at the doctors getn a check up on my body then he heard a scream and he ask hu was that screaming i said its the doctor she took a look at my body and was very happy at what she saw the boss heard his wife say who's that opn the phone i said its a brother from another mother she said oh is he hot! i said nah he ugly he just looks like your husband hu gregory the boss said thats ma name what the @#$!% are you doing with ma wife i said boss you have just been punkd he said you have just been fired you get the letters F-I-R-E-D Fired! see ya boss
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Bakery Slap
i was working at the local bakers in sutton then one day a women came in and said 'want your buns' so i just stood there and said 'i beg your pardon' 'i want you buns' she repeated i walked around the counter, slaped her and THEN i found out that she was German
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Drunk
I showed up at my job drunk. When the manager said how you doing. I just cussed his ass out.
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window shoper
well i worked at a local store called kcl deli and i had to bring my niece to work with me well she was thristy and so i paid for a soda out of my money and my boss said that i was giving her free things althrough he seen me take money out of my pocket and put it in to the cash machine he fired me on the spot.
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